She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize