Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize
