I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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