benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Randomize
