i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Randomize
