Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
