The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
he thought i was a dude.
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
