The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Holy shit dude........stairs
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