i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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