Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
