I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
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