just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
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