I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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