When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
Life is so much better after having sex.
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Randomize
