Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You pole danced in your parka.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
