I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
MIDGETS
????
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
