two of my INSANE ex girlfriends just texted me saying their coming over because im home alone. needless to say, im deleting my twitter.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
