omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
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