dude i'm inner monologue high
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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