What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
