If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
everyone is single if you try hard enough
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
Randomize
