Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
