i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
you started shaking the frozen steak while screaming "THIS IS CAPITALISM" before rubbing it all over your chest and passing out on your dog
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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