Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Your cock deserves a montage
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
