I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize