this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize
