every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
I was so drunk I got motion sickness from sex.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize