Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize