I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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