Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
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And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
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I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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