But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Randomize
