He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Randomize