I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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