Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
Randomize
