My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
She kept telling me that it pissed her off that i expect people to make out with me...then she made out with me. Win?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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