the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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