I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
I found out he put two potatoes in a jar because he wants to make his own vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize