Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize