she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
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