just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
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