dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
