Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
my liver is dry heaving
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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