Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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