If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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