I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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