I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Randomize
