If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
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