return my video game
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Randomize
