i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
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