it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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