people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
This baby is an asshole
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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